Law of Opposites

The Law of Opposites is just a variation of the Law of Unintended Consequences. When we attempt to achieve a certain goal – like, “make the world safe for democracy,” a grandiose scheme of World War I – one can be sure the world will become less safe and less democratic regardless of the motivation. ~ Ron Paul

an excerpt from my journal entry 2-2-09:

if you hold yourself to certain expectations it actually prevents you from achieving them.  in the end you just have to know life can be a wonderful journey, and stop letting things from letting you experience it. 

my fear of failure prevents me from actually doing most things.  i guess i should be a “yes girl,” and to be honest i’ve d one much more since returning from omaha.  i visited mia madison in new york city, went out to dinner with friends a few times, visited prance kitten multiple times, went to dc.  and coming up is a cake competition with a friend, seeing prance kitten again while i’m up that way, pc alumni weekend and britney.  that’s a lot of activity for a girl that normally lives in a box. 

if you’re a shut-in nothing will ever happen, because opportunity doesn’t knock on your front door, you must seek it.  seriously i stopped taking voice lessons because of fear, i stopped taking dance lessons, and i picked a major to avoid being compared to family members that most certainly would have been a failure in comparison.  it seems like i really miss out on a lot…

When Lying Is Good

i am the worst liar i know.  i can’t lie even if it meant a life of happiness.  this past weekend my horrible skills were put to the test.  i was in dc for my brother’s birthday.  his girlfriend was planning a surprise part for him.  keeping that from him was hard, but when he decided to make his own plans it got even harder.  the party was suppose to start between 8 and 9, but the only reservation we could get for dinner at Ray’s the Steaks was 9:30.  when he looked to me for agreement on the time (since we normally eat around 6 or 7) all i could do was stare blankly back at him.

luckily i wasn’t the only one who knew about the surprise and my sister fixed it.  we went to dinner where his gf would meat us (last week in an email my sister typed “meat” instead of “meet”…i couldn’t resist here seeing that we were at a steakhouse), but we finished our meal before she arrived so we needed to stall. 

how do you stall any boy?  you start talking about them.  it’s often stated that girls love talking about themselves, but boys love it more than we do.  it worked like a charm, as we chronicled all of his major life accomplishments.  she was there shortly, blindfolded him and threw him in a cab.  i made it the whole night, without spilling it.  the best part was seeing him caught off guard because that never happens, he normally taps into his sixth sense aka body language.

Ross: Phoebe, there is no secret, okay? I didn’t propose!
Phoebe: Are you lying? Is this like that time you tried to convince us you were a doctor?

Twin 1 Twin 2

i look forward to the little things in life. whether it’s having chile rellanos for dinner, the wonders of my flat iron, or attending my cousin’s baby shower. this weekend my mom and i went shopping. i guess it was “right” to get things off her registry, but when i saw these i knew we had to get them even though they weren’t on the list:

my cousin constantly refers to her twins as twin 1 and twin 2. i figured this would help her keep them straight until she can tell the difference between them. they came with a number 1 foot and a number 2 foot per set, so i rearranged them. with this gift she won’t have to pull an uncle jesse and fingerprint each kid. this is my type of gift, practical and humorous.

Casino Christmas Eve

last year i was in a football pool, and this year i’m in something even bigger… a twins pool.  my cousin is pregnant with twins, and my family spent christmas eve taking bets as to when the second twin will be born.  you have to pick the date and time (6 hour windows) closest to the actually birth.  i put all my money (all $2) on march 28th from 6pm to midnight.  i have some stiff competition, but i’m all for anything that makes the months after christmas more exciting.

Memories of Yore

i hope everyone’s christmas was filled with wonderful new memories.  mine was filled with memories of yore; my parents made dvds of old family vhs tapes.  it’s funny to watch them and see the same characteristics that we, as adults, embody today. 

for my brother’s 4th birthday a game of pin the tail on the donkey was in order.  even then my brother was a cheater.  he claimed he couldn’t see out the front, but my mom knew better and readjusted the blindfold.  somehow he could still see out the front and claimed he had no idea how he pinned the tail so close. then my mom asked if he was lying, and even though he said no he said it suspiciously.

another christmas my sister and i got magazines like tiger beat.  my sister got really excited, “it has nsync, backstreet boys, 5ive, 98 degrees!”…..then came the disappointment, “oh but it has hanson.”

january 2004, i was right on:

dad: what do you think of the red sox this year?

me: they’re going all the way.  there’s no doubt in my mind; i feel it in my veins.

…and i was right even back then!

Christmas Circus

this is a little silly but since it’s christmas themed…i love it.

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? 
Wrapping Paper

2. Real tree or Artificial? 
Artificial, never have had a real tree..my brother is allergic

3. When do you put up the tree? 
december 1st…i’m not allowed to do it before hand

4. When do you take the tree down? 
christmas evening…i don’t like it up much after that

5. Do you like eggnog? 
i’ve never had it

6. Favorite gift/gifts received as a child? 
i was really excited when i got a pool table, but i hardly use it

7. Who is the hardest person/persons to buy for? 
my sister

8. Who is the easiest person to buy for?
my mom…anything centered around wine is pretty much a winner

9. Do you have a nativity scene ?  
janet has one

10. Mail or email Christmas cards ?    
Mail…the only time besides birthdays that you get cool stuff in the mail

11. Worst Christmas gift you ever received?  
socks…but i get those every year

12. Favorite Christmas Movie? 
garfield christmas story

13. When do you start Christmas shopping?
when i have time to

14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present?  
nope

15. Favorite thing/things to eat at Christmas? 
my gingerbread house

16. Lights on the tree? 
Lots of white- non-motion…very classic

17. Favorite Christmas song?
Carol of bells

18. Travel at Christmas or stay at home? 
travel to get home

19. Can you name all of Santa’s reindeer’s?  
there goes dasher, and dancer, and donner, and blixten, commet, and cupid, and something and vixen, and the most famous reindeer of all rudolph

20. Angel on the tree top or a star? 
angel

21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning?
one on the eve, the rest in the morning

22. Most annoying thing about this time of the year? 
crowds of young kids that whine

23. What theme or color are you using?  
classic red and green with some silver and gold

24. Favorite for Christmas dinner? 
cranberry sauce out of the can

25. What do you want for Christmas this year? 
hang with the fam

p.s. i got the leaked britney cd, circus, and i’m loving it.  download it…you’ll thank me later.

Support System

it’s nearly 1 am and i’m wide awake. 

so what do you do when you feel like you’re standing still while the rest of the world is running around you frantically?

sometimes i wonder if i’m being punished for a previous life.  other moments i want to fall asleep and wake up a few years from now when my life is sorted out.  but is there really such a point?  i don’t think so.  i look at my mom.  she had the life: a great family, a good career, and her health…virtually no worries.  then out of no where her mom (my grandmother) passed away.  at that instant her world came crashing down, and nothing else mattered. 

sometimes i wonder what it’s going to be like to live without my parents…and i can’t picture it.  they are my support system; the people i go to when i don’t know what to do or where to go.  i can call them with worries and in the end know it will all be ok.  no matter how old i get, they will never let something bad happen to me.  but after a while, it’s hard to keep accepting their help. 

i feel like i should be able to do things on my own, but there’s always something bigger than what i can handle on my own.  most of the time all i need is advice; when it’s more, i feel guilty calling them.  i think, “i’m 22, i should be able to handle this.”  but when you’re in such a difficult situation, it’s comforting to know i call them without judgement to find the guidance i need. 

everyone deserves parents like mine.  the type that can read your mind and say, “i was just going to call you” when they pick up the phone.  it’s like they know you better than yourself.  the people who can see what’s really going on, even if you aren’t ready to admit it.  the one’s who know you’re lying when you say eveything’s fine.  the people who ask the right questions to make you come to your own conclusion.  sometimes i hate that, and wish they would just tell me what to do…it would be easier.

Cancer

today i am thankful.  my uncle is battling brain cancer and although the tumor will never disappear, it basically shrunk to nothing.  he had been in this fight since february and it has taken a toll on him.  so i’m very happy to hear this news and that he should be feeling better. and this whole experiences makes you reevaluate your life…

he was a healthy young man.  he was very involved with his church and family.  then out of no where…brain tumor.  so like my mom now says, “if i want chocolate for breakfast, i’m gonna have it.”

Are You Afraid Of The Dark?

at the hospital i work at, the building is undergoing construction.  and the other day, that meant, we lost power for a split second.  instantly, i covered my ears and was about to slide under my desk for protection, because i wasn’t sure what was happening.  i thought i wasn’t scared of the dark anymore, but i guess i never out grew that one.

in my defense, when the hospital loses power, it doesn’t just go black…all sorts of weird noises echo through the halls, while generators click on.  also, i sleep without a nightlight, although there’s nothing wrong with that. anyway i guess i wasn’t as brave as i gave myself credit for.

i will still admit to being afraid of heights.  that is something i still tremble with.  one time i was up in a space needle, when my sister (knowing my fear) decided it would be funny to jump on the glass floor.  of course i started freaking out and screaming.

lesson of the day: know your weaknesses and don’t let them get exploited

Omaha, Somewhere in Middle America

Well I’m here…Omaha, somewhere in middle america; and it was an interesting past few days leading up to today.

Two days ago while I was still at home packing and prepping for an adventure of a lifetime, my car left with some of my most ”valuable” treasures inside.  My cousin, let’s call her sophia, and I made arrangements to send our cars.  With the price of fuel where it is, sending it is comparable to driving but is still more.  So she made a mental list of pros and cons of driving to omaha with her mom.  She realized that they would be arguing the entire ride because her mom, the godmother (as she will now be referred).  The godmother likes to drive in silence; radio, talking, and especially whistling are not allowed.  What a miserable and long ride.  So we called a company and scheduled a pick-up with a man named saba (this is where the story really gets interesting).

First the cars were to be picked up on monday, but no saba.  Then it was tuesday, no saba.  So finally we had enough of him, and wanted to protect ourselves.  We thought it was appropriate to ask for his full name, to which he replied, “why you wanna know? you no need to know.”  (for obvious hilarious reasons this has become the catch phrase for omaha…which has lead to it being posted on my facebook wall).  Eventually his driver showed and the cars were loaded.

My dad was there when they were loaded and was talking to the driver.  He asked him where he was from, the guy said, “Ukraine” (this is where you must use your imagination to make use of his accent that cannot be shown in type, just think U-Kkkkraine with that arabic like throat noise in the Kkkkr position).

So today, the cars pulled into NE and we are finally settled.  If this is the start of our adventure, I can’t wait for the rest of it to begin.